Have You Become The Square Peg Trying to Fit into the Round Hole....?

Are you the proverbial Square Peg, Round Hole woman..? Outgrowing something doesn’t mean you’ve failed… it just means you’ve evolved, right?

You know that uncomfortable nudge, that whisper that something no longer feels right... I know you know, but what are you doing about it....?

We’re told to ignore it, especially as women.  We’re taught to be grateful. To stay loyal. To smile and make it work.  Even when the room we’re in feels like it’s closing in around us.

We also choose to stay there, because it's our comfort zone, whether we like it or not, right?  Me too.... the hardest thing in the world to do is face things head on when they no longer fit for you.  

But here’s what I’ve learned…

You can love a person, a job, a whole damn lifestyle and still know it no longer fits. That’s not you being flaky. That’s you growing.

Let’s talk about it.

Friendships: Letting the tide shift without drowning in guilt

I’ve got friends who go back decades and I’ve got newer Abu Dhabi friends. Many of my friends are a result of working with them.  My friends have been with me through all the drama's of life...

The ones who helped me crawl through the wreckage.
The ones who cheered when I reinvented myself (again).
The ones I haven’t spoken to in months but still adore.

They ebb and flow and I’ve learned to stop taking it personally.

Because we’re all shifting.
Pivoting.
Navigating marriages, divorces, teenagers, menopause, career rewrites, elder care, and our own bloody identities.

Sometimes we ghost each other for a while, not because we don’t care, but because we’re just trying to stay afloat.

So when something feels off with a friend, I don’t jump to judgement anymore, I open a conversation. “Hey, are you okay?” 

Because I’d rather talk it out than let it fade into awkward silence, although I'm guilty of that too.
Some friendships evolve. Some fade. Some hold steady no matter what, that's all part of life.

You’re not a bad friend for growing. And neither are they.  

Divorce has a funny way of changing not just your relationship status, but your entire social landscape. Suddenly, I found myself craving new experiences, adventure, travel, maybe even climbing a mountain or two (ok ok, a hill...) 

Meanwhile, some of your old friends are perfectly content sticking to the routines you used to share like catching up over drinks once a month, having a laugh, and keeping things as they were.

And here's the thing: it's not that my old routines are wrong or my friends are any less important. It’s just that I was evolving, my life had taken a turn, and I was discovering new layers of myself that crave different experiences.  AND, I was damn well embracing everything that was new in my new chapter.  

When something feels different with a friend, it’s not about pointing fingers or feeling guilty. It’s about saying, “Hey, our lives have shifted, let’s talk about it.” Sometimes, that conversation helps you both adjust and continue growing together just a little differently.

Other times, it’s an opportunity to gracefully acknowledge that you’re on different paths now, and that’s okay.

In the end, it’s not about losing old friends; it’s about making space for the new ones who match this chapter of your life. And who knows? Your new journey may inspire your old friends to be bolder, shake things up if needed.  I know it has for many of mine!

Careers: The ladder’s leaning on the wrong wall... again

You all know I’ve spent years in the HR world, the corporate space, oil and gas, navigating roles with big titles and even bigger expectations. For a long time, I thought that was who I was.

Then one day, I looked around and thought, “This room doesn’t speak my language anymore.”

Worse, I started shaping myself to match the room.
Softer edges. Polite nods. Less truth. More tolerance.  Less swearing!  Urgghh!!! 
Until I realised… I don’t want to belong here anymore.

It’s not that the room is wrong. It’s just no longer mine.  I was the square peg trying to fit myself into the round hole quite literally!

I still have my LinkedIn network, full of amazing professionals in oil and gas and HR. But my new world? It’s about digital evolution, curation, creativity, coaching, and redefining success in midlife.  It's a whole new room that I'm not just comfortable in, but super curious about where it's taking me.

So when someone recently asked, “Are you still ambitious?” it saddened me.
Because that question came from a different room. A room that defines ambition by titles and ladders.
I define it now by alignment, joy, and autonomy.

And that’s the pivot.

You can be deeply ambitious and want something entirely different than you did five years ago. Ten years ago. Geez, even six months ago.

Why we ignore the signs (and why we shouldn’t)

We feel the misalignment early, but we brush it off.  Just that fleeting thought is enough, yet we ignore it.

Because we’re mums and partners and helpers and doers.
We’ve been raised to make things work, not walk away from them.

So when something doesn’t feel right, we rationalise it.

We blame hormones.
We say it’s just a phase.
We stay longer. We try harder. We guilt ourselves into gratitude.

But let me say this clearly... you are allowed to grow.
You are allowed to want different.
You are allowed to leave the room.

The Square Peg feeling is not a red flag.
It’s a green light.

Final thought: You’re not the problem. You’re the upgrade.

So if you’re sitting in a friendship that feels disconnected, in a career that feels like a costume, in a lifestyle that no longer inspires you...

It’s not you being ungrateful.
It’s not you being difficult.
It’s you being honest.

The question isn’t “What’s wrong with me?”

It’s “What no longer fits?”

Because when you finally stop squeezing yourself into spaces that weren’t built for who you’ve become, you make room for the people, projects, and places that are.

Let the misfit energy guide you my friend...

You’re not a Square Peg.
You’re just not in the right room... YET.

Start making those manageable changes that you've been secretly desiring in your midlife. If you had a Life Coach (which is really what The Midlife Audit Workbook is), you'd be making moves, taking decisions and shaking off the old.

Grab Your Copy Here, 

It's only a few Starbucks worth!