It's January. Everyone's Buzzing. You Feel... Nothing
Not feeling excited?
It’s January. A new year. A fresh start.
Apparently, we’re all supposed to be excited, energised, motivated, and ready to get after it.
New goals. New habits. New you.
Except… you feel nothing.
Not sad. Not angry. Just flat.
And you’re quietly wondering what the F is wrong with you.
Don't beat yourself up... for many of us midlife women, the build up to a New Year is a massive stressor and digging deep to face the optimism of it all is often not worth your peace.
When The New Year Hype Completely Misses The Mark
January has a particular energy to it, right? Loud. Performative. Full of declarations. Social Media is the worst place to spend your time right now unless you're good with People talking about:
clarity
intentions
resolutions
“this is my year”
And you’re sitting there thinking,
“I don’t even want to get out of bed, never mind reinvent my life.”
For a lot of midlife women, January isn’t a reset, it’s a collision.
Real life hasn’t paused just because the calendar flipped.
There are still:
careers you don’t enjoy
bosses who drain you
relationships under strain
kids leaving, returning, or needing you in new ways
separations, divorces, grief, illness, loss
I’ve spoken to several women this side of the year who’ve had family loss over the festive period. Nobody in that space is interested in bloody resolutions.
So if you’re feeling disconnected from all the “new year, new energy” noise, cut yourself some slack, because the messaging doesn’t match your reality.
Let’s Be Honest About January Expectations
January expects clarity from women who are exhausted.
Energy from women who are depleted and a tonne of optimism from women who are grieving or stretched thin.
And if we don’t meet those expectations, you start kicking yourself.
What’s wrong with me?
Why can’t I just get my head straight?
Why do I feel so flat when everything’s “fine”?
Listen...
Nothing is wrong with you.
Feeling nothing in January is incredibly common, it’s just rarely said out loud.
The Nothingness Nobody Talks About
Midlife nothingness is sneaky... I know from experience!
You still function.
You still show up.
You still get dressed, go to work, make dinner, keep the plates spinning.
But inside, it’s like the volume has been turned down. You’re masking, because you’ve been trained to. Structured to.
I bet you've been high-functioning for decades, right?
And then out of nowhere hormones wobble or flatline and the adrenaline that carried you for years disappears.
If you've like me right now you'll be experiencing:
brain fog
words vanish mid-thought
creativity dries up
motivation feels unreliable
But I've learned to reframe it as I know I'm not falling apart.
I'm recalibrating, my friend.
The pain in the ass is that nobody tells women that this is what recalibration feels like, so we all think we are on the downhill to twinsets and knitting!
The Uncomfortable Part
(and I won’t sugar-coat this)
This phase does pass... but it doesn’t pass by waiting for motivation to magically reappear.
And this is the bit most people don’t like hearing.
Sometimes you have to move before you feel ready.
Not in a hustle way or a “push harder” way.
But in a very basic, human way.
You don’t wait until you feel energised to act... you have to act so the energy has somewhere to return to.
I’ve been in this space myself over the past few months. Brain fog. Low creativity. That “I can’t be bothered” feeling.
And at the same time, genuinely happy. Celebrating my engagement and looking forward to what’s coming.
It's a weird place as both can exist very quietly together.
Feeling flat doesn’t cancel out joy and joy doesn’t erase exhaustion.
So How Do You Come Back From Nothingness?
Not with bloody resolutions, that you weigh you down as soon as they leave your lips! Not with pressure, and and definitely not with comparison.
You come back through:
small actions, not big plans
honesty instead of self-criticism
structure that supports you, not traps you
space to think again
Clarity doesn’t arrive in January with a bang.
It returns quietly, when your system has enough capacity to hear itself again.
What I know is we have a choice, we always do. Do the thing... make the call, catch up with friends, pick up the hobby again.
You’re not behind and you're not failing at New Year! Contrary to belief, you also don’t need to “fix” yourself.
Nothingness is often the pause between one version of you and the next.
Uncomfortable, yes.
But also necessary.
January doesn’t need your ambition or another list of "New Me" shit.
It needs your permission to slow down without shame and the energy will come back.
But first... stop beating yourself up for not having it yet.
